Friday Joke of the Week

The Name is Rose It seems that this old couple are having trouble remembering things, so they sign up for a memory course. The course is wonderful; they come home and tell all their relatives, friends, and neighbors about it. Some months later, a neighbor approaches the man as he tends the garden.

Neighbor asks, “Say, Ed, what was the name of the instructor of that memory course you liked so much?”

Ed replies, “Well, it was…hmmm…let me think a minute… What’s the name of that flower, you know, the one that smells so nice, but has thorns on the stems…?

Neighbor says, “You mean a rose?”

Ed replies, “Yeah, that’s it!…(shouting toward house) Hey, Rose, what was the memory course instructor’s name?

Friday joke of the week.

Three Elderly Men

 

Three elderly men are talking about their aches, pains and bodily functions. The seventy-year old man says, “I have this problem. I wake up every morning at seven and it takes me twenty minutes to tinkle.”

The eighty-year old man says, “My case is worse. I get up at eight and I sit there and grunt and groan for half an hour before I finally have a BM.”

The ninety-year old says, “At seven I pee like a horse, at eight I flop like a cow.”

“So what’s your problem?” ask the others.

“I don’t wake up until nine.”

Friday Joke of the Week

Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers when the youngest one began praying at the top of his lungs, “I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE. I PRAY FOR A NEW NINTENDO. I PRAY FOR A NEW VCR…”

His older brother leaned over and nudged the younger brother and said, “Why are you shouting your prayers? God isn’t deaf.”

To which the little brother replied, “No, but Grandma is!”

Friday’s joke of the week

Pet Names

An elderly man was invited to his old friend’s home for dinner one evening.

He was impressed by the way his old buddy preceded every request to his wife with endearing terms-calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc. The couple had been married almost 70 years and they were still very clearly in love.

While the wife was off in the kitchen, the man leaned over and said to his buddy, “I think it’s wonderful that, after all the years you’ve been married, you still call your wife those loving pet names.”

The old man hung his head. “I have to tell you the truth,” he said. “I forgot her name about ten years ago.”